Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Found the puke drawer
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
