found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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