I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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