Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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