return my video game
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
