Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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