Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
