You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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