The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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