Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
