Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
