Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
