My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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