I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
