As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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