isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
