Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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