After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize
