Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
COCAINE IS GR8
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
