If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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