shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
