I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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