I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
