I CAN MOONWALK!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Randomize
