i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
