please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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