And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
