now i know why i became what i already was.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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