uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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