so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
