Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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