honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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