i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
So vagazzling was a success
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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