Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
