i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
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come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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