honey bunches of taint.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
