her vagine was all disorganized.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
