So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I have already put on my inside pants.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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