hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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