I need help removing her.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
