I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
