perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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