I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
The uberlube is also flammable
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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