I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize