Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Your dad touched me again.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
