Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
