people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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