dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Randomize
