I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Alive.
So much puke
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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