Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
