I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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