Its about making memories worth repressing
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
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